Understatement is an Understatement

This has nothing to do with poker but I was just so blown away when I read it.

Man uses nail clippers in DIY circumcision A man who gave himself a DIY circumcision using nail clippers was taken to hospital for emergency treatment.

That’s the lead-in to a story the gets more and more bazaar by the sentence.

The young man had to be rushed to the Lister Hospital in Stevenage, Hertfordshire. The wound was disinfected to cleanse it before he was given a bed in an observation ward.

“This is something we would advise men never to attempt,” a medic said, “The results can be quite horrific and long-lasting and have quite an affect on a man’s sexual performance.

Really? You really felt it necessary to make a point that you don’t advise this? I thought chopping away at your penis with a pair of nail clippers was the recommended way to remove a pesky foreskin. Thanks for clearing that up for me.

“Using a pair of nail clippers must have caused excruciating pain, even if he had had a few drinks beforehand.”

Really? I was wondering if that would hurt. Then I thought, “Well it probably wouldn’t hurt after a few beers,” but again you’ve set me straight on that one too.

Personally, I think this is all part of the main stream medical community conspiracy to keep us from doing minor surgeries ourselves and saving a little cashola. In fact, I’m going to prove it. Hold on while I get my nail clippers. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

Okay, maybe he was telling the truth about the excruciating pain part. Wait, should there be this much blood? I’m not feeling so gooooooooooooooooo

Photocred to worak